The U.S. Central Intelligence Agency has been known for its, er, ingenuity, from using heavy metal music for psychological warfare, to creating spy kitties wired with listening devices to infiltrate Soviet embassies. The agency has also never shied away from using drugs to achieve its ends, and in the '60s supposedly dosed unsuspecting subjects with LSD for 77 days straight in some kind of mind control experiment. Given this history, it's not surprising that the CIA would also put Viagra to use to reach military intelligence objectives. The U.S. needed some leverage to gain the trust and loyalty of tribal leaders in war-torn Afghanistan, but cash and showy gifts were too conspicuous. Sex always has universal buying power, but when you're dealing with fundamentalist Muslims, offering prostitutes is out of the question. Then someone came up with the bright idea of passing out Viagra. In a tribal system where procreative abilities are key to power and influence, the magic blue pill could be gold.
Of course, it didn't hold the same appeal for everyone, but it had its specific applications:
"You didn't hand it out to younger guys, but it could be a silver bullet to make connections to the older ones," said one retired operative familiar with the drug's use in Afghanistan. Afghan tribal leaders often had four wives -- the maximum number allowed by the Koran -- and aging village patriarchs were easily sold on the utility of a pill that could "put them back in an authoritative position," the official said.
Wonder if Pfizer has a contract as a supplier to the Dept. of Defense.
So what name do you think the agency assigned to this scheme? We went over to the Random Military Operation Name Generator and came up with a few that might have been suitable:
Operation Eternal Missile
Operation Congested Omar
Operation High-pressure Fatwa
Operation Piercing Beaver
Operation Sore Lover
Operation Engorged Python
Operation Ejaculating Turban
