Everybody feels a little violated by the Transportation Security Administration claiming the right to touch your junk in the defense of national security. To make a point, there's been at least one prankster who's taken Viagra before getting a TSA pat down. Some folks, on the other hand, don't need any help in that department for setting off the TSA's alarms. What happens when the guy with the world's largest schlong steps through one of those full-body scanners? Jonah Falcon (yes, that's his real name) is that guy. And he had a recent run-in with the TSA. The actor (Yes, he's a legitimate actor. Please. He refuses to do porn.) was traveling through San Francisco International airport, when he was waylayed by security agents.
As he went through the security area, Falcon said he had his "stuff" strapped down, but its bulkiness drew the immediate attention of guards, who asked him if his pockets were truly empty. After proceeding through the X-ray scanner, Falcon was asked if he had some sort of "growth".
Well, yes. You could call it that. It's a growth that's 9 inches flaccid and 13 inched erect.
Falcon said that he was subjected to an extensive pat down in which the male screener felt all all around his "area".
He says that next time he'll just wear bike shorts, so there will be no question as to the nature of his carry-on.
Or, to make it absolutely, positively clear, he could follow the example of an Oregon man who stripped naked in the Portland airport to protest the TSA's invasiveness. John Brennan was acquitted today of charges of public indecency when a Multnomah County judge ruled that his disrobement was an act of protest protected by First Amendment rights to free speech.
