Viagra Philosophy: The Philosophical Implications of Viagra

It's not hard to see what has fueled the swell in the demand for Viagra by middle-aged men: The deflated egos of men who firmly believe the essence of their masculinity is the ability to maintain an erection for hours on end. Before Viagra, many of these guys attempted to inflate their self-esteem by holding to a rigid schedule of pumping iron in the misguided belief that if the they had bodies of steel, no one would suspect they had rods of rubber. Now, instead of steroids, these same men are willing to pump hard-earned money into the popular chemical stiffening agent. The long-term result? Flabby men with terminally turgid members and permanent smiles plastered to their faces arm in arm with sleep deprived, frazzled females with haunted looks in their eyes. Eyes that have seen too much.

Some men view Viagra as a fantasy pill that has leveled the playing field between men and women. Exploding the myth of penis envy, men have long envied a woman's ability to engage in the sex act without requiring the full cooperation of a temperamental organ that seems to have a mind of its own. But has the playing field really been leveled? It takes two to tango. And even though women don't need much more than some lubrication to go through the mechanics of having sex, it takes some stroking between the ears, as well as the legs, for women to enjoy sex. It seems some men believe that, with Viagra on their side, they can skip that pesky foreplay and let Mr. Penis do what he does best.

I don't deny that Viagra has its place in the medical world. For men with true physical sexual dysfunction, and the women who love them, it is a miracle. But contrary to what healthy Viagra poppers believe, its indiscriminate use may not bring them and their partners emotionally closer. In fact, it may have the opposite effect. Drawn as a cartoon, some women may view Viagra as a huge cutout of a classically painted penis looming menacingly between she and her partner, a la a Monty Python sketch.

Some men would argue that they take Viagra to satisfy the women in their lives. Newsflash: Women can be satisfied in many ways, boys. And extra points are given for creativity. Making dinner? 10 bonus points. Folding the laundry? 20 points. Oral sex? 30 points. Cleaning the toilet? A whopping 50 points. Trust me, guys, there's nothing sexier than a naked man using his raging hard-on as a dishrag holder while he goes about cleaning the house. Try it sometime. I guarantee the woman in your life will be turned-on at the molecular level.

I don't fault a man for chasing the male dream-come-true--the Every-Ready Erection--making him the Energizer Bunny of sex. But guys, time for a stiff dose of reality. You know what happens to the toy that just keeps going and going? It's fun at first. Then you tolerate it. Then it becomes maddening. Then, just before you pull your hair out, you yank out the batteries.

Don't let this happen to you.